Current Annoyance…

It’s annual report time and my boss has chosen to wait to have me send them out till 5 day’s before due date so I’ve had no time to write a full and detailed post. Here is my current annoyance…

This stupid commercial http://www.carlsjr.com/ontv It’s a god damn commercial. I have seen worse. I’ve definitely seen better. Just get the hell over it for pete’s sake. She is not hot (I guess I’m not a good judge here though), she has done nothing of importance, if she wants to do a commercial that makes her look like a $50. hooker all because her dog prefers to eat at this one burger dive then who are we to judge. GET OVER IT!!!!

The way forward is sometimes the way back.

Ok I am sick and sick is not a good thing to be and because of said sickness I am only going to go over the Friday 13th, NIN/ Dresden Dolls show in Boston thing briefly.

While in Boston we had the pleasure of a personal Duck tour thanks to Jet Black who drives his Salmon colored duck boat like a manic. :) It was fun being in a pinkish duck with a bunch of friends dressed in Goth gear, streaking down the streets of Boston, getting weird looks, and scoffing at the quacking tourist. I'd do it again in a heart beat! Heck they even dropped us at our restaurant.

The restaurant was this cute little Italian place that we would have never found on our own (thank you Amy) but was within easy walking distance of the Orpheum theater. They had affordable, yummy food with waitresses who were quick to help us but a little on the forgetful side. We all seemed to have a great time and over ate to our hearts content.

I had an amazing time at the NIN / Dresden Dolls concert. I fully admit to being completely blind to anything but the mind numbing experience of seeing NIN's live. Sorry I cannot help it, I have wanted to see them since the moment I fell in love with their music, which coincides with me stepping out of my Susie homemaker life into the one I am currently residing in. The place was a little too warm though, and I thought for sure I would pass out. I bought two tee shirts one for me that's so damn thin I think it was meant for wet tee shirt parties and the other for the boyfriend who deserved it for putting up with me screaming and jumping around like an idiot.

There's more to the night but I'm just not in the mood to go into it all right now. I had fun nuf said......

Wait, can I do it all again and this time avoid the getting sick thing?

Excuse me is this your fork in the road?

Oh this day is just getting better and better.

My biological mom just stopped by work. (Insert confused look here)

That's right my mom.

The one who shuns her non-child bearing, unmarried, eldest child, in favor of her other two daughters with marriages and children and her youngest son who still lives with her. She lives an hour from here while her three daughters all live within fifteen minutes of each other. She sees Mary Ellen and Jean at least three times a month. I know because they tell me this. However, I haven't seen her since...oh last spring at one of my nephew's birthday parties I think. I'm not bitter. I've actually come to terms with it a long time ago. I know it's my fault. When I was fourteen years old, I probably shouldn't have told her to get bent and not come to my birthday parties in July if she couldn't make it to Mary Ellen's in October. (She did this three years running and I couldn't stand to listen to Mary Ellen cry anymore.) Since then I don't see her in July or December. This includes cards and phone calls as well. I do get an occasional email but it isn't holiday related no matter what time of year it is. I only run into her at family functions like birthdays or weddings or the occasional run in at my sisters when she stops by. Ah whatever! Still for her to actually make an effort and stop by randomly at my work place! Where she's never been and all she wanted was to just say hi. Wha What????

Gee maybe I should get all excited or something. Wait I think this is it.............. No false alarm sorry just gas.

Off the road again... Just can’t wait to go off the road again……

Holy crap batman, road rage issues much!!!

I just had some guy scare the ever-living piss out of me. I was pulling out of the bank on RT25 in Standish. It is fairly busy this time of day so I saw an opening and I took it. The large red pickup truck that was coming up the road was far enough away that I had plenty of time to make it. So, I’m pulling out of the lot. Someone is of course behind me and I am about halfway into the road when I see the stupid idiot in his red penis envy truck speed up! What does he think I can do at this point? I am in the damned road, there is a little old lady behind me blocking my escape backwards, and he is looking like he’s going to ram me. Therefore, I speed up and pull the rest of my car out. Well the idiot does not slow down he gets right up on my bumper and I mean right up. I can see him screaming and the spit flying out of his mouth quite clearly. I can’t go anywhere because I’ve seen he’s a redneck moron already and I’m close enough to the car in front of me that I can read the wash me on the trunk of the car. I’m panicking a little now and he’s coming right up to my car, backing off, right up, and backing off. Then my completely irrational cave man friend does something even more frightening. He pulls out into the middle of the road and starts to pull in beside me. I have no choice but to move over or get side swiped. I tried slowing down but he slowed down with me forcing me to drive beside him in the breakdown lane, which is getting smaller now because were getting close to the light, which incidentally is red, and I will have to stop for it. I cannot speed up because “wash me” is still in front of me and they do not look like they are impressed at all. Finally, Mr. Personality pulls up and lets me in behind him. I am sure it was only a minute but god it felt like forever. He then stops at the red light and opens his door like he is getting out. I of course cannot back up because there is a Rider truck pulling up behind me and traffic is coming in the other direction. So what do I do, I pull out my trusty never works in Standish cell phone, roll up the windows, and lock all the doors. However, my brain donor friend does not want to get out and snap my neck. No, he just wants to spit at my car and wave to me using his middle finger while ranting about the c***’s of the world and how I should suck his abnormally large penis. This show of testosterone while appropriate at wrestling shows and racecar events did not have the affect of making me quake in my gothy attire. It in fact had me wondering how he had avoided evolution so completely and when were scientist going to realize the missing link drove a big red pickup truck in Standish Maine. I considered breaking out in a rousing country song as a show of support but my confused grin at this thought seemed to provoke his ire more. Luckily, the light turned green and the Rider truck made sounds of protest that they would like to move in a forward direction even if it meant over Mr. Penis Wrinkle and me, thus with a hearty one finger wave in my direction and a squeal of tire’s on pavement. We were separated, hopefully never to meet again. Then again, Standish is not so big and he might be a client here. Now wouldn’t that be a kick in the pants!

Distraction

Ok most of you know I have a small, discreet, stocking collection nothing major it is not a fetish. Well ok it is but it’s a good one. Today is a rather boring day at work and I've been on eBay looking at stockings since 10am. Just for something to do. I haven’t bought anything. I jokingly said to my boyfriend on IM that my goal was to see what the most someone would pay for a pair of stockings is on eBay. I have just reached what I think are the ultimate in stockings. I have a thing for the back seam / cuban heals. I mean come on!! They have to be the sexiest pair of stockings EVER made. I just found a pair online. Thigh high / nude with black accents / cuban heal / back seam / LATEX stockings These are going for $76 not including the shipping which is discussed after bidding closes. No, I am not going to buy them. I just wanted to share this unimportant discovery with someone since I had to go through 114 pages until discovery. Ya I am that bored……………………………………..

Where did the monkeys come from?

I have had some messed up dreams before. Vivid, colorful, violent, dreams that made no sense at all.

My weirdest dream ever, happened shortly after the break up with my fiancé of 7 years. It would have been in 2000 I think and yet this dream is still stuck in my head as if I just had it yesterday... I was standing in front of a refrigerator. The door to the freezer part was open and I was holding a man's head. The facial features and hair length, style, and color kept changing to represent all the men I knew or would know in the future. I remember staring at this head trying to get it into focus and to stop it from changing. Eventually I gave up and put it into the freezer to keep it warm. Yes, I said warm not cold. Hey, it's my dream I'll warm things in the freezer if I want too.

A few years ago I had a series of dreams about killing my friends off in weird ways. I cannot remember the order except that the one involving Ian and Inge was the last one I had. I know how they all died and who they were but I do not know if I was the killer...

The one involving Tallon was the most vivid for shear brutality reasons. I walked into a room with no real furniture to speak of and there were pieces of him all over the floor. It looked like someone had put him through a chopping machine and left all the pieces where they landed. I walked around the room looking at the pieces trying to identify the owner and only knew it was him because his hair was pulled back in the same way he usually wears it and that part was intact. Well that and the black fabric from his usual attire and pieces of soft leather mingled in with bright red chunks of flesh.

In a different dream of this series, I watched as a friend drowned. It was like observing through a large glass tank at the aquarium. She was trying to swim up but never got anywhere even though it appeared that nothing was preventing her from reaching the top. Eventually she started to panic and her limbs worked in frantic uncoordinated movements trying to force her body to move, until finally the air released from her lungs in one big burst. She struggled for a few more moments slowing down increasingly until she just stopped and stared blankly ahead almost like she knew I was watching. I remember thinking the water was so blue and perfect.

In another dream, I watched as a female friend was run over by a car. I was standing on the side not really there and she was running along just barley able to keep ahead of the car. I am not sure how long she ran but I do know it was no competition for the car. I did not recognize the model. Just that it was a black car, not to clean, not to dirty, and the windows were tinted so I did not see the driver. Not that I was even looking. In all these dreams I never looked for the reason of the killing just watched as my friends died. The impact of the car caused her to roll up onto the hood and bounce off the window. I heard a crack when she struck but it was not apparent that the sound was her back until she rolled off the car onto the ground. It was then that I could tell she was not going to be able to move again. Her back was twisted almost around to the side but just the lower part, making it so if it were possible for her to move her head she could have looked directly at her backside. She was not dead though, well not yet, it was not until the car screeched to a halt and backed up onto her again that she actually died. The truly horrible thing is she watched the car coming and could not even move. Her scream was cut off by the rear left tire going up over her throat. Weird that I know it was the left huh?

Next on the list was a shooting. Again I do not remember where this took place just that it was outside and I knew the place well. My friend was laughing and talking to someone. Her companion was someone else I was acquainted with but they were not important enough to stick in my head at the time. The day was bright and slightly breezy and there was no real rush in her walk to get to anywhere of importance. I remember smiling as she started to pass by where I was standing, and I was thinking hey this isn’t so bad maybe I’ll go say hi. I noticed the red on her shirt next. It was not a big spot just a little one but it was on both sides of her body. She had this odd look on her face as she passed me like she was trying to get rid of heart burn or something and then she was on the ground face down. Her companion was looking around franticly and trying to pull her to cover. They rolled her over and you could see the red had saturated through and was overflowing onto the ground. Her eyes were staring at the sky I could not tell them it was way to late to try and save her.

The last dream in this series involved Ian and Inge and I am not sure if they caused it to happen or not. I remember telling them about my dreams and how messed up they were. I told them that I had dreamt of all these fucked up ways of people dying and Ian said something me about me not thinking them important enough to dream about or some such bull shit. That night I had the oddest dream. It started with me staring at a door. As I reached down to open it I noticed the doorknob was a little hot but it did not burn me so I opened the door stepping through into what had to have been Ian and Inge’s bedroom. Ian was lying in bed fully clothed in his bar room attire smoking a cigarette. He was calm as could be and actually appeared somewhat bored. Inge however was completely engulfed in flames beside him on the bed. From the look on what I could see of her face she might have been screaming but I could not hear it above the sound of the flames spreading up the walls and across the floor.

All of these dreams were in color and in none of them did I interfere or participate in anyway other that observation. I should also mention that I know exactly who was shot, drowned and run over but they told me to leave their names out because I freaked them out with these dreams. So why am I bringing up old dreams? No reason other than there still in my head and I have had yet another dream involving a member of our crowd.

In this dream Wally had the staring role. That’s right Wally congratulations you are the next contestant in my brain isn’t right. There were a bunch of us sitting around someone’s house probably Ian’s by the look of it. Wally was wandering around with a pair of monkey playing cymbal toys. He spent the entire time shoving them in everyone’s faces and trying to give them away. They were old, dirty, and smelly and made the worst commotion ever. I took them away numerous times to take the batteries out but Wally kept putting them back in.

So, Wally where are you hiding the monkeys playing cymbals? I know you have them somewhere I can still hear that damned noise in my head!!!! Welcome to my brain. Make yourself at home. Can I get the monkeys anything? Sigh…